David Update

I talked to Dr. Goble (our cardiologist here in Lansing) she has direct link to the cardiologist in Mott.  Surgery is needed.  They will be working on his narrow Mitro Valve and the narrowing under the Aortic Valve. They will leave the ballooning area of the Aorta alone (fixing the narrowing may relive some of that).  Do not know when surgery will be yet because I am waiting for them to call me on that. 

Paul wants to wait until after Christmas, Dr. Goble doesn't want us to wait that long because of the horrible cold and flu season and doesn't want him to get sick.  I see Paul's point in waiting but I'd rather get it done and over with so we can move on and get back to our normal lives.  So it will be after the new Mott opens which is around the 12th of November but I think we are going to try to hit for the week after Thanksgiving.

I cried after I got off the phone.  Why my baby?  Why does he have to go through this?  I know this is something every parent of a heart baby had thought if not said out loud.  But I know we can handle it. We've done it before even though it was four years ago but he's a strong willed kid.

I'm ready... let's do this thing so we can move on.

Surgery in the near future

So results are in... David is going to need surgery.  How soon we don't know yet.  The meeting between the cardiologist and surgeons happens Monday afternoon.  Our cardiologist will get a hold of me next week.  We are trying to decided if we do it right before Thanksgiving, between Thanksgiving and Christmas or just after the first of the year.  I'm rooting for the first week of December but it will NOT wait until spring.  We do know that much.  Here are some pictures of what his current issues are.

Don't know what to make of it really... Worried for one.

Well... onward with our life, day by day.

Almost D Day

It's Monday night, tomorrow night we back a bag to head to Ann Arbor for David's heart Cath.  He's ready to 'go to the doctor' but he has no idea what's in store for him.  I'm very sad he has to go through this but this is what makes him such a strong little dude.  He's been doing AMAZING in school and I am so excited that he's learing and catching up on some things that Matthew knows and Matthew is finally learning not to answer for David and let him do it himself. 

Example... Tonight we had steak for dinner, David was sounding it out and asked me... "does is start with an S?" and Matthew said "good job David!"

So tonight I relax, tomorrow I pack and get NERVOUS.  Wednesday bright and early the craziness starts.

Wish us luck.

Changes

I am feeling much better thanks to a few changes I am making to make myself better.  First off... I am the queen of clutter.  We have a small house yes but we need to make do with what we have and make it a better place to live in why we are here.  We have so much clutter I get in a panic and don't  know where to start. 

Two weeks ago today I cleaned the bathroom and laundry room.  Both of which are still clean.  That has never happens before.  I've cleaned them yes but the clutter and mess always returns by weeks end... not this time!

The cat now named Butters... I have kept his litter cleaned up very well (he's messy).

Today I cleaned the livingroom.  Now it's not spotless by any means but it does look good.  I'm not done but it's an awesome start.

I know these things being cleaned are going to make my hubby happy so he'll be in a better mood and not so grouchy and then it will trickle down to all of us!

I'm Not Ready For This

I haven't been happy lately, my anxiety is getting to me and I'm starting to feel depressed lately too.  I'm not the happiest with my job or my family right now for various reason.  It's all stuff I'll get over but normally I get over stuff way faster then this.  It just hurts more this time. :(

I'm not ready for fall and winter... I absolutely HATE this time of year.  My SAD is already starting to act up (seasonal affective disorder) which is acting up early this year.  I'm sure that's part of my problem but I haven't had any good news lately to make me happy.

First... medical bills... collections calling my parents for money we owe them, seriously??? They call my parents??? I have no idea how the hell they got their phone number.  I will be calling them tomorrow and bitching them out for that.  Bills in general... we can never get ahead.  It would be nice to run into a bunch of money right now and pay some things off.

Second... I hate this house, it's to small and it sucks.  I hate living here, I hate it more and more each day.  We have the oportunity to rent my in-law's house which would be awesome but we'd have to get rid of this house.  If anyone knows the market... yeah... that's not going to happen.  We are stuck.

Third... We just got a cat.  Which I've been wanting for a long time.  He's a great cat.  He's only been with us for three days and he's already fit in but... I'm already 2nd guessing the decision to get him and may take him back.  Why?  Because Paul complains about the cat hair so much, that's all he's done since we got him.  The cost of buying food and litter when money is already tight, the adoption fee (which will get refunded if I take him back because he's not working out), and the fact that even though he's a great cat, loves to be petted and scratched he's been hiding under the bed most of the time and not out being a part of the family.  It's upsetting me so much it's causing me panic attacks just thinking about it.  I don't want to take him back but I am now thinking it'll be better for him.

Fourth... and the worst... David has to have another heart surgery.  To what extent we don't know yet.  He had a heart cath on October 5th we will know more details after that.

So yea, my life has been nothing but depressing lately.  I'm going to have a talk with the doctor about it tomorrow.  I'm already on meds for my anxiety.  I hate feeling like this.