Paul had his concert with the Lansing Concert Band last night. The Lakewood Choral Society sang too. Paul's Aunt Bev sings in that. But my mind was just racing as I sat there listen listening to the beautiful music both groups produced. I just CANNOT shut my mind off.
This morning didn't help much as I was checking my facebook posts. The UofM hospital and Mott Children's hospital pages both had pictures of the first ICU patient being moved from the old hospital to the new shortly after 7 this morning. I cried real tears as I looked at the pictures.
Why???
Many reasons why.
1. I am kinda excited about David's surgery because I am excited to see and be in the new hospital. Surgery means they will fix my baby.
2. What if something goes wrong and David doesn't make it? What if this is our last Christmas with him? What am I going to do without him?
This cannot be happening to me. I cannot think these bad thoughts. As I type this he's sitting on the floor in front of me with a HUGE pile of dinosaurs. That kid LOVES dinosaurs. He's so healthy, how could anything bad happen?
The good thing with a mind that doesn't shut off is there is always something else to think about and get my mind off the current bad thought. We will move on and enjoy Christmas. Take David to his surgery... three days after Christmas, and pray for the best.
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